Thailand Tonight – 27/01/10

SOI COWBOY – A WALK ON THE WILD WEST SIDE

Once again, I thought it was time to visit Soi Cowboy and so, I took a motorbike taxi to ‘Little Las Vegas’ as I call it.  The neon signs glare at you with a kaleidoscope of colours, and you immediately become immersed into the atmosphere.  Nowadays, Soi Cowboy is very different from the dark, dingy and uninspiring place that I visited over a decade ago.  Perhaps it could now be known as, ‘Disneyworld for the big boys and girls.’

THE CHEERLEADERS OF SOI COWBOY

This week I want to mention the ‘Cheerleaders’, or the girls who stand outside the go-go bars.  I decided to introduce the term ‘Cheerleaders’ because ‘door girls’ is boring and could be a bit misleading to some people.  These so-called ‘door girls’ do not collect tickets, money, or jackets, as they would in Farangland.  The Cheerleaders job is to collect people and not items.  Furthermore, they stand some distance away from the entrance doors in Soi Cowboy.  What they actually do is ‘cheer’ and then ‘lead’ you into the go-go bars.  And so, there is my reason for using the term Cheerleaders.

THE STRIP GO-GO BAR, PATPONG, BANGKOK

THE GOOD GIRL VS BAD GIRL DEBATE

Some Cheerleaders are more original with their ‘pitch’ than others are, and they might even address you by your first name.  They tend to present the persona of being ‘good girls’ and this is true in certain cases.  The Cowboy Cheerleaders are generally a fun and friendly bunch, some would even say very playful.  These particular Thai girls have chosen to become Cheerleaders and there must be a reason for that decision.  This ‘reason’ is what you need to find out if you are interested in a Cheerleader…  Why is she not a go-go dancer?  Was she previously a go-go dancer?  Does it boil down to peer pressure?  Does she have a controlling boyfriend?  If she is a ‘good girl’, why is she working for a go-go bar?

When you are looking at a potential ‘good girl’, there can often be more complications than with a go-go dancer.  This is because there is an element of mystery about ‘good girls’ but with a go-go dancer, it is mostly a case of what you see is what you get.  It is incredible to think that a young Thai girl can have a wealthy foreigner attending to her every whim.  There is evidence of WMD in Thailand.  Some of these Thai girls have Weapons of Mass Distraction!  But, in saying that ‘happy hunting’ and remember that it should be fun.  After all, life is too short to be too serious.

HOLLYWOOD INN HOTEL, NANA PLAZA, BANGKOK

FROM THE HOUSE OF HORRORS TO PLEASURE PALACES

The Soi Cowboy bar owners make the effort to attract customers and are prepared pay out the cash.  They employ a team of friendly and in some cases very attractive Cheerleaders.  This does not mean a rough old bird sitting on the door looking bored beyond all belief!  They also hold up placards advertising ‘Happy Hour’ and other promotions. I think Soi Cowboy has used this method very effectively.  By combining Cheerleaders with drinks deals, they attract the early trade.  From late afternoon into the evening, the outside seating areas are always occupied.  As Sanook Sean and I noticed, some of the farang crowd at ‘Happy Hour’ are rough and ready, but as you know, the important thing is to get bums on seats.

Right outside Tilac Go-Go Bar is an ideal spot for dolly bird watching.  Alternatively, you can watch the world go by at a leisurely pace, while you relax after a hectic day.  The outside seating areas, the Cheerleaders and the drinks deals, are among the most appealing aspects of modern day Soi Cowboy.  Do you remember Soi Cowboy 10 to 20 years ago?  Some of those bars had absolute shockers and were like the house of horrors!  Since those days, some pleasure palaces have emerged and it is a very different scene in Soi Cowboy.

THE STRIP, PATPONG, BANGKOK

JUMBO DOES A TON IN SOI COWBOY

The distinct lack of elephants in Soi Cowboy comes as a major relief.  I think it is dangerous for the pedestrians and not pleasant for the elephants either.  Elephants belong in the jungle and not on crowded roads and streets in a chaotic capital.  I remember one elephant had to relieve itself and did a ton in the middle of Soi Cowboy.  Thai Police on the scene advised people to treat it as a roundabout!

But, on a more serious note, if Soi Cowboy was a ‘walking street’ it would be a positive move.  Motorbikes whiz up and down Soi Cowboy, as thought it is built for boy racers.  Now Soi Cowboy just has to get rid of the motorbike maniacs!

IT’S A SLIPPERY SOAPY SLOPE IN SHEBA’S AND SUZIE WONG

Sanook Sean and I were lucky twice in a row, when we visited Suzie Wong and Sheba’s.  With impeccable timing we watched the sexy soapy show in Suzie Wong and then again in Sheba’s afterwards.  The Showgirls were smiling and interacting with the audience in a provocative way.  In fact, one customer had his entire head covered in soap foam.  There’s nothing like audience participation!  The slippery soapy slope continued, as one of the Showgirls was sliding up and down her friend’s slender body.  They were using the old soap-a-dope trick!  I don’t mind admitting that I left Suzie Wong and Sheba’s rather boggle-eyed after the soap-a-dope sexotic show.

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